The Responsibility

Over the past few weeks, I have had some conversations with friends regarding the construct of race, racism, and who has the responsibility for dismantling racism as we know it. I know that I can take on a lot of difficult tasks and sometimes I get great pleasure from it but when it comes to solving racism, that is not my ministry. As a Black woman, in America, I have been taught that it is important to be accepted by the majority and what that can mean is explaining why it is important to be treated as a human being and not a pet. In addition to the conversations with friends about racism, I have had a few white women on the podcast who have talked about racism and how they see it, who is responsible for the dismantling of racism and how they decenter their whiteness. I can imagine that it is not the easiest thing to come on a podcast where you don’t know who will hear it and share things like “we don’t have to be in all the spaces” or “some spaces and places are not for us to inhabit” or “it is true that you can just sit back and let Black folks and other people of color share their experiences without you adding yourself to the mix” (my guests have said something like that, those are not direct quotes). I can imagine that it is hard to take responsibility for something that you may have or may not have contributed to (something like privilege and whiteness) but you acknowledge it, address it, and speak to other white people about it. I had my dear friend, Melissa, on the podcast a few weeks ago for part 1 of our discussion and I asked her, “Who do you think is responsible for eradicating racism, is it white men or white women?” She thought it was an interesting question and needed to think more about it but one thing was for certain, she knew the responsibility rested on the shoulders of white people.

Being in white spaces after the murder of George Floyd was rather toxic. I can remember receiving emails, at work about the “civil unrest” (nevermind that we have been in a “civil unrest” for over 400 years but I digress…) and all of a sudden some managers wanting to start implementing book clubs that focused on reading books about racism and addressing it in the real world and in the workspace. One manager had the audacity to ask me to lead the book club because I was “always reading books” and thought it could be a great project for me. I looked into the windows of her soul and said, “Respectfully, no.” After she expressed her confusion for why I was not interested in this project, I said to her, “I find it very disturbing that after everything that is happening in the world today, you actually expect for me to lend out additional labor to start a book club that addresses race and racism so I can be traumatized by people who will look me in the eyes and tell me, ‘I don’t have a racist bone in my body’ or ‘my grandchildren are Black’ or ‘I don’t understand why everyone can’t just pull themselves up my the bootstraps’, that is not only additional labor for me. It is trauma. Besides, I do not need to read a book called “How to be an Anti-Racist” (good book by the way), that book is designed for you.” Guess who didn’t lead the bookclub? I do not need to read books about being an anti-racist or a book about allyship…that is not my role. My role is to just be here and thrive and hope that the next generation gets the shit right for my son, my nieces, my nephews, and the little cousins in my life.

I recommend checking out the episodes with both Emily and Melissa. It is great food for thought.

xoxo,

Chioko

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